


i know you mean well

by tboi



Category: Persona 3, Persona Series
Genre: M/M, Zine Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:02:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24184834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tboi/pseuds/tboi
Summary: Minato is tired of being special, tired of Orpheus thrumming beneath his skin, tired of being told he’s so special - leader, leader, leader, they say. Wildcard, Igor grins when he visits the Velvet Room, The Fool spread between his gloved fingers.
Relationships: Arisato Minato/Mochizuki Ryoji, Mochizuki Ryoji/Persona 3 Protagonist
Comments: 2
Kudos: 105





	i know you mean well

**Author's Note:**

> this was written for the free time persona zine! tysm to everyone who bought a copy, digital releases are finally out so i can share this now :]

The November chill goes straight to Minato’s bones, even beneath the heavy peacoat he wears—he stands outside the entrance of the school and rubs his hands together, breath fogging in the air in front of him. The sun sets in the east, darkness crawling its way into the sky already, late afternoon bleeding into early evening. Minato hates the early sunsets—it’s gloomy.

“Hey,” a voice calls, breaking him out of his trance. Ryoji crunches through the snow towards him, no jacket to cover his small frame - all he wears to suggest he’s feeling the cold at all is the yellow scarf he keeps wrapped round himself at all times—Minato has yet to see him without it. He wonders if it’s fused to his person.

_ Hi,  _ he signs lazily, hands stiff from the cold.  _ Took you a while. _

“Yeah, yeah,” Ryoji waves his hand, nonchalant. “This girl was talking to me. What was I to do?” He places his hands on his hips, cocky smile on his lips. “But don’t worry—you’ve got my full attention for the rest of the day.”

_ Lucky me,  _ Minato says, his face stony.  _ I’m so honoured. _

“As you should be,” Ryoji says, light and teasing. “What’s on the agenda today?” 

Minato shrugs, unsure. He’d wanted to spend more time with Ryoji—he feels an unexplainable, inexplicable pull towards the other boy, two planets orbiting each other— though they seem more likely to crash into each other than to continue any kind of peaceful orbit. It seems important—it seems foreboding. 

_ I’m supposed to walk Koromaru today,  _ Minato says, suddenly realising.  _ Come back to the dorm with me? _

“Of course,” Ryoji says, cocky smile turning into something softer, more real. “Lead the way.”

_ You know the way,  _ Minato reminds him. Ryoji has been to the dorm before, enough times that he could easily find his own way there—he’s done it before in the dead of night, scaled his way up the wall and into Minato’s room to talk quietly with him, moon illuminating his face, his eyes bright and tired. The blue of his iris bleeds into the pupil of his eye, an ocean swallowing land.

“That’s not the point,” Ryoji tells him as they begin to walk, making his way ahead. “You strike me as more of a leader than a follower, you know.”

_ If only you knew,  _ Minato thinks, Tartarus on his mind. He pushes it away, hopes the building will somehow crumble in the night—he’s tired of it. He’s tired of being a leader— Shinjiro’s death weighs heavier than anything he’s ever had to shoulder. Minato can’t remember his parent’s faces, but he knows Shinjiro’s face like he knows his own, relives his last moments in his dreams, and somehow knowing is worse than forgetting.

“Hey,” Ryoji says, snapping his finger against Minato’s forehead. “Did I say something wrong? You look glassy-eyed.”

_ No,  _ Minato tells him.  _ I’m just tired. _

“Hm,” Ryoji hums as they walk up the front steps and into the dormitory. “You should try drinking tea before you sleep.”

_ Why?  _ Minato asks, heading into the living room. Nobody is in just now—Koromaru is sprawled out in the middle of the floor, ears perking up at the sound of Minato’s footsteps. Minato heads over to him and rubs under his chin, and the dog’s tail begins to wag happily.

“There are certain kinds that are meant to help you sleep,” Ryoji says, kneeling down next to him to scratch Koromaru in between his ears. “Where’s his leash?”

_ On the hangers at the front door.  _ Minato says, and then,  _ Doesn’t tea have caffeine in it?  _ Ryoji doesn’t answer because he’s turned his back on him to pluck Koromaru’s leash off the hanger, and he quickly affixes it to his collar. Minato supposes he will never know.

“There you go,” Ryoji says to Koromaru as he clips the leash onto the dog’s collar. “Where should we take him?” 

Minato shrugs.  _ The park next to the shrine?  _ he suggests.  _ There’s enough space for him to run around there. _

“Okay,” Ryoji says, turning to open the door. He makes a clicking noise with his tongue as if to signal to Koromaru, who happily pads outside, pawprints making tiny marks in the snow. Minato closes the door behind him with a small click.

_ You didn’t actually have to come,  _ Minato says as they make their way through town. The wind chills, and the snow is fresh - Minato watches Ryoji’s boots leave marks in the snow in front of him with some sort of detached fascination.  _ I kind of expected you wouldn’t want to when I invited you. _

“Decline your invite and miss out on spending time with you?” Ryoji says with a smile that borders on a smirk. “How could you suggest such a thing?” 

Minato rolls his eyes.  _ You’ve used that line on everybody in the school, you know,  _ he says.  _ Try harder.  _

“Oh!” Ryoji says, hand over his heart. “You wound me, truly. You  _ are  _ something special.”

Minato is tired of being special, tired of Orpheus thrumming beneath his skin, tired of being told he’s so special -  _ leader, leader, leader,  _ they say. Wildcard, Igor grins when he visits the Velvet Room, The Fool spread between his gloved fingers. 

_ Tired,  _ Minato thinks.  _ I’m special and I’m tired. _

_ Of course,  _ he signs, rolling his eyes.  _ But let’s pretend I’m not. I just want to have a normal day walking my normal dog with my normal classmate.  _ Ryoji’s eyes go distant, hazy, like he’s remembering something far off and long gone, but a soft smile soon returns to his face.

“Of course,” he says, softly. “We’re almost at the park,” he points out as the swingset comes into vision—no small girl sits on the seat today, Minato notices. 

_ Let him run around,  _ Minato tells Ryoji, pointing to Koromaru.  _ He won’t get lost, he’s good.  _ Koromaru barks in agreement.

“Be good,” Ryoji tells him anyways, as if the dog is going to leave his sight - he unclips the leash from Koromaru’s collar and he goes bounding off, kicking up a flurry of snow onto Ryoji’s pants. Minato stifles a laugh behind his hand.

“How old is he?” Ryoji asks, watching the dog sniff his way around the playground, tail wagging. 

_ I don’t actually know,  _ Minato admits, frowning slightly.  _ Akihiko probably knows. _

“I shall have to ask him,” Ryoji remarks, falling silent for a beat. His gaze fixes on the ground, but he’s somewhere far away, somewhere Minato can’t reach when he asks, “Does this winter feel off to you?”

_ This year feels off to me _ , Minato remarks, thinking of the Velvet Room.  _ What do you mean? _

“I don’t know,” Ryoji admits, looking down at his hands. “I can’t seem to recall any other winters, so I have no frame of reference, but it feels…” he trails off, and Minato feels unable to finish his thought for him—he glances over at Ryoji, takes in the sharp profile of his face, and wonders why he feels so  _ familiar. _

_ Is it me? _ he asks, tries to frame it jokingly.  _ Maybe I’m bad luck. _

“No,” Ryoji says, “but I feel like I know you.” A soft puff of air leaves Minato’s mouth in what could be an  _ ah _ , and he looks down at the ground again.

_ I thought I’d met you before, _ he says,  _ that was the feeling I got when I first saw you. Like a childhood friend gone missing, only to return a decade later. _

“Yes!” Ryoji exclaims, places his hand on his heart. “That’s - what it feels like.”

_ Weird,  _ Minato remarks, desperate for this conversation to take a lighter turn. Orpheus hums a tune older than he is in his mind, underneath his skin. Thanatos stirs.  _ Call it deja vu? _

“Not quite,” Ryoji frowns again, the corners of his mouth pulling up in a way that seems innate in its familiarity. “But I suppose we have time to figure it out.”

_ We do,  _ Minato says, and can feel that it is a lie.  _ We—  _

He’s cut off by a sharp yelp from Ryoji, as Koromaru comes bounding out of seemingly nowhere to pull the scarf from his neck. 

“Hey!” Ryoji shouts, as the dog wags his tail at him. “Koromaru,” he tries, “give it back.”

_ He’s going to bolt,  _ Minato remarks just as the dog does just that - he turns tail and kicks snow up behind him as he bounds out of the park.

“What if he gets lost?” Ryoji asks, concern clear on his face. “We should chase after him, surely-“

_ He’ll go back to the dorms,  _ Minato tells him.  _ He always does. _

”Shall I race you there?” Ryoji asks, mouth quirking up into a familiar, cocky smile.

Minato says nothing, and instead reaches his hand out and finds he is relieved when Ryoji grabs it. 

_ You know the way,  _ he reminds him, and Ryoji’s laughter carries crisp and true through the air, breath coming out in puffs.

“I suppose I do,” he says, and pulls Minato along, the strange, sticky winter forgotten, warmth from their held hands enough, just for now.


End file.
